Plan 12 from Outer Space
Let’s find out. First, get the worst scriptwriter you can find. Keep him fuzzy on tequila and Flexeril cocktails. Clock him the head with a frying pan every couple days just make sure he stays disoriented. Since Ed Wood is dead, you’ll have to settle for Steven Soderbergh to direct. When you get to the editing process, make sure you excise all the parts that help the audience follow the story.
With luck, when you’re done you have an incoherent, stream-of-unconsciousness montage of pretty people in pretty places doing things that make no fucking sense at all. Except that they’re acting like it makes perfect sense. Like they know exactly what’s going on.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Smith household entertainment for last evening: Ocean’s Twelve.
Gods, what an inexcusable mess. I’ve seen Three Stooges shorts with more narrative continuity and chimps who could have done a better job directing.
The movie gets one star because it has Catherine Zeta-Jones in it. Sadly, she seems about as lost as I was…
The good news: Ocean’s Thirteen! And rumor has it that Celine Dion will be in it. Ooh – maybe she’ll sing.
My cup runneth over…
lullaby pit 
That movie was a mess. I’m sad to say, I actually paid ot go see it.
Aloha,
Jeff
That movie was a mess. I’m sad to say, I actually paid ot go see it.
Aloha,
Jeff
Alas, I paid to see it as well… such a pity; the first film was a lot of fun. More proof to the pile that sometimes, a really good film just needs to stand alone and just say NOOOOOO to sequels!
Alas, I paid to see it as well… such a pity; the first film was a lot of fun. More proof to the pile that sometimes, a really good film just needs to stand alone and just say NOOOOOO to sequels!
When we saw the first one, it was on HBO and we were on a surf trip. The night that we saw it was one of the best nights of my life. I looked forward to the sequel, thinking it would rekindle some of the earlier joy. Instead, we ended up leaving saying, “Huhhh, what just happened?” The only worse movie we ever payed money to see was “Doctor, Where Does it Hurt” starring Peter Sellers. Since I’m a big Sellers fan, I thought it would be a treat. We walked out 2/3 through the movie.
Aloha,
Jeff
When we saw the first one, it was on HBO and we were on a surf trip. The night that we saw it was one of the best nights of my life. I looked forward to the sequel, thinking it would rekindle some of the earlier joy. Instead, we ended up leaving saying, “Huhhh, what just happened?” The only worse movie we ever payed money to see was “Doctor, Where Does it Hurt” starring Peter Sellers. Since I’m a big Sellers fan, I thought it would be a treat. We walked out 2/3 through the movie.
Aloha,
Jeff