Where the hell is my trash can?
So, my new trashcan is missing. It was outside and had a couple heavy bags of garbage in it. Now, we had some serious wind last night – we’re in the midst of the windstorm from hell right now – so I initially thought maybe the wind got it and blew it away. But:
- The lid was laying five feet away, and in that kind of wind you’d think it would be Zeus’s own frisbee.
- I walked all around the house, up and down the street, into the open space across the road – nada.
- The garbage is gone, too. Now, if the can was going to blow away, you’d think it would have tipped and dumped the garbage, right? And while the can might fly, those two bags of garbage lacked anything remotely like aerodynamic potential.
So is there a garbage can thief in the neighborhood? I mean, if you need a new garbage can and you’re a certain kind of loser maybe you figure free beats whatever they’re charging down the street at Lowe’s.
But again, the garbage is gone. Surely you wouldn’t steal the trash, too?
I’m flummoxed. Seriously. I guess it’s possible that the wind carried the whole shooting match off and that my trashcan is currently touring Erie, CO. But if it made that trip without dumping the trash inside, there are some crews in Daytona right now who can learn a thing or two from the folks that designed it.
In the meantime, if anybody finds a new garbage can with a couple bags of standard household trash, give me a call.