Jade Helm 15: here’s what I don’t get

By now I’m sure you know that the US is preparing to invade Texas. All kinds of self-medicating gongbats concerned sovereign citizens have dissected Washington’s nefarious scheme and they stand ready to defend The Republic from …

Okay, here’s where I need some help. I’ve been studying a map of the US, and I even consulted Wikipedia. Best I can tell, Texas is part of the United States, right?


So, how do you invade yourself?

Never mind Obama, folks. You need to find a hot tub time machine and head back to 1845, when James K. Polk (who never released his real birth certificate, either) annexed you in the first place.

Jesus is coming, children, and he’s a’fixin’ to mess with Texas.


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