I want to check in and see how people are faring. Times were getting to us before COVID, and I’m guessing that nightmare hasn’t helped.
Things here are fine, more or less. Bored as fuck, especially on the days that used to be weekends. Getting together to watch Chelsea with my Rocky Mountain Blues tribe was always something I looked forward to, and not having that contact gives a sense of … alienation is too stiff a term, but there’s certainly an unsettled loneliness. Disconnectedness … wrongness.
I can’t even kill time watching sports on TV. This is typically prime NBA/Nuggets time for me.
And I’m really going bonkers on the photography front. There are several projects on the boards, but they all require me to be out and in contact with people. So I’m stuck here shooting flowers I get at Safeway, and as much as I obviously love shooting florals even that gets tired after a while.
I feel lucky, though. I try and imagine being the age of my gf’s kids. I’ve gotten a lot more comfortable with being home through the years but when I was that age I was out literally every night.
The internet helps. As much as it’s to blame for much of what’s wrong in the world, it is a lifeline to friends, to family, to the world beyond the front door. I’ve had a couple of Zoom happy hours with friends, including an online gathering of some old Theta Chi brothers from Wake the other night. Those are more than just keeping up, too. I get to interact with guys I haven’t talked to since the mid-’80s. So maybe COVID will help us expand our networks a bit.
When I think about how this is on kids in their 20s, I sometimes go a step further and try imagining this happening in the ’80s when I was that age. No Net. No Scholars & Rogues email community. None of the incredible TV we have today. No. Fucking. Nothing. I’d read constantly, sure, but would bookstores even be open?
It’s not a comfortable thing to contemplate.
As is, life inside the walls is manageable. J and I are taking steps to make sure we stay on the same page and give each other extra space. No matter how much you love someone, what we have here is a divorce lawyer’s dream. When we “reopen the economy” they’re going to get swamped.
And when I go out I get to rock the badass mask my friend Cat made me. I want to beat people who aren’t wearing them, though. Fucking sociopaths.
Anyway, I wanted to say hi. How are YOU doing?